Sunday, April 24, 2005

Worst movie ever: Sahara

It's so bad, I'm not sure I can even write about it. I wanted to like it, too. I absolutely love a good PG-13 action movie. You get all of the adventure with none of the gore and super scary stuff (stop rolling your eyes! Some of the best action movies aren't rated R -- Raiders of the Lost Ark and Star Wars were actually just PG).

I tried really hard just to focus on how good looking and naturally charming Matthew McConaughey is, and to block out Penelope Cruz and her five lines with visions of him and his bongos. It didn't work. This movie was so bad it was funny. I just recently read that this film is the first film directed by Michael Eisner's son (Michael Eisner being the head of Disney), so I guess that explains a lot. You don't need much of any skill or talent when your dad owns the universe. I should have known better.

The weird part is that Sahara seemed to have all the components of a good, if brainless, action movie. They had the hot, swashbuckling star, the goofy buddy who is always losing his hat, the personality-free lady character who looks great in a push-up bra, an evil dictator bad guy, funny camels, ancient ruins, many high-speed chases followed by massive explosions... I suspect that Sahara could have been a lot better if they just would have had believable dialog. It makes me think that the book that the movie is based on, by Clive Cussler, might actually be a pretty good read. Cussler has a series of novels about the adventures of the hero of Sahara, Dirk Pitt. Maybe I'll take a few on vacation with me.

2 comments:

Jenica said...

I'm just floored by the fact that they kept getting stranded in the desert without water, yet they were never thirsty. In fact, all of the water in the area was poisened.

Matthew was cute though.

Anonymous said...

Didn't Michael Eisner get fired?