Monday, October 16, 2006

No more hot sauce before bed

I'm supposed to be writing a two page paper about tort law or product liability, so of course I'm blogging up a storm.

I had this crazy nightmare last night that I was pregnant. It used to be a recurring nightmare for me back in college. There were many different variations, but nothing as intense and scary as this one. In this particular dream, I'm pretty pregnant by the time I've realized I'm pregnant -- like four or more months -- and my belly hurts, so I'm terrified that there's something wrong with the baby. In the dream, the guy who helped me get pregnant doesn't want me to have a baby, and has little interest in discussing the problem with me. We are touring empty lots and construction sites and I am trying to start a conversation about it. I know I don't want to raise a kid on my own, and am really not ready to be a mother at all, so I don't really want to have a baby either. However, the pain and movement in my belly is sharp and I am terribly worried that something is wrong with the baby and it's not going to be okay. The whole nightmare is filled with not knowing what to do about the pregnancy, being unable to make any decisions about it, but also being absolutely terrified that the baby is hurt or dying and feeling like I love it and want it to be okay more than anything. And on top of that, my whole body was covered in dark purple varicose veins that are a complication of the pregnancy.

Pregnancy must be common subject matter in women's dreams. I'm sure this a straightforward anxiety dream, but it makes me suspect I may be stockpiling a little more anxiety in the back of my brain than I previously thought.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I believe it was Shark who once said, "Abort them all"

It was funnier in context?

I don't think I can die before I make Shark a t-shirt with that slogan and see him wearing it in public.

P.S. I have no problem with babies.

Anonymous said...

I just want to know who helped impregnate you. My money is on Walloch!!

Turd Ferguson said...

Yeah that was real funny Hip. Especially because of the "context". He was talking about babies that were relatives of mine. And 2 of them died. Hahahaha. Utterly hilarious.

Anonymous said...

I can honestly say I have never ever dreamed about being pregnant. I did have a dream once that I was watching someone else’s baby. It was super small and wrinkly, like there was something wrong with it. I set it in a bookshelf and forgot about it there.

Yeah, not sure I should be revealing that much of my psyche, but too late, but that freaking dream haunted me.